creature of show

i am a creature of show, i dance behind the mirrors i delicately lay out for the world to see me through, sometimes i am beautiful others ugly, tall and thin and mis formed and imposable to chase down in my maze... so much so sometimes i forget which reflection is my own. I dream of someone one day taking the effort to smash and break every mirror, to walk over the broken glass and through the dust to find me... i suppose for that to happen though i would have to exist outside of my reflections... its been so long i think i have become the glass.
does he love me? will i be his wife, the mother to his children, will i live in his home? will he ever touch me again... its so hard to know. i don't know. i don't know if i should. i am lost somewhere far beyond my self.
he sleeps, or jests to sleep now beside me, breathing heavy... not for me just because he smoked to many cigarettes i am sure. will he kiss me when i am done with this and i lean in to whisper i love you... maybe... probity naught more than a peck.
i miss being sated... i think more than anything else in the world... that none of those things will ever happen if he dose not start to touch me on a more regular basis...