because a poem ++

when i see you
the soft colours of neverbes rest in the forefront of my mind.
and as i stand before you
i feel in half a second every price of me fall naked
all the sin and blood and malice of my soul....
it pulls over me
it swirls up into me...
and then i breath.
and then i see more clearly things as they are.

he sits there, tucked into my hair
whispering all the thoughts i should not think...
he says just once to touch him...
and i shutter away lost in those eyes.
i hold back my own hand of lust,
that i am a creature of tactile sense and pleasure.
i repress that feeling.
i bite my lip and i smile.
not everything is sex.

and worst then she whispers at night,
the sweeter nothings of my heart...
that i LOVE in war and fight and pain,
that i love so many so thanklessly
that i am so willing to give my whole heart
a slut for cupid... that i would
could one love every person.
i can not tho... i can not love,
or rather i can never admit love.

and lies become me, as a smile.
and i speak to you.
this truth even is a lie.
and you know, you've always known.
i see it in you.

ill settle to be your friend,
because.