remember me....

this time of year i feel so more full of thought than normal, i feel more soft and more vulnerable. its scary. i was on ok cupid "improving my matches" i really like answering the questions, and one got me thinking. it was "if you could take back your virginity from your first partner would you?"i clicked the check box for no, with out a thought.
i remeber those eyes, and that skin, just like mine.
the touch, soft and shaking... the nervous entry... the blood and the blade. think that scars still on him, a battle wound? and in the moment then, i wasn't scared of anything but him not finding happiness.
and i remember her, silk goddess of the sky. i remeber her age and her sureness and her ability to make me turn liquid in her touch... a perfected art. she was the painter i was the canvas and my sensation was the masterpiece... i had never felt, i have never felt that way again.
my joyful bliss in her.... perfect bliss in every moment we layed together, but we were not meant to last forever, only as long as the passion flowed... i would never undo those moments though, she was one of the greatest gifts of my life.
and sam, sweet pure sam. the one i never got to be with, the one i wanted to love more than another and the one i tried to hide that love from in other peoples beds... if i could take anything back i would have never left, but i would never take back the moments we were together...
anyways i need to go take a shower.